Trolls, stalkers and threats: ten years of my blogging experiences
I’ve had this blog since January 2009, and it has seen a lot in that time. I’ve also had a website since around 2005. So for the tenth anniversary of the blog and fourteenth of the website (merged in 2014), let’s do a little summary of what has happened:
For 3 years, I mostly wrote book reviews; not much happened. Around 2012, it started to get a bit of traffic because I started writing about narcissism, which was just getting popular as a blog subject.
- In May 2012, two of my abusers came to my blog after not looking at it for a couple of years. They discovered I’d been writing about their abuses, accused me of lying, threatened me with a lawsuit–and also threatened to stalk me at church. I knew I was telling the truth, and zero lies. So I stood my ground, kept the blog up, and continued telling friends/family/church friends/priest what was happening, as I had been doing for two years already. It has now been 7 years, and no lawsuit. The statute of limitations has also long since run out. These two abusers still read my blog, but none of their many threats ever came to pass. I count this as a victory. I’m not sure why they check my blog anymore, because these days they often spend maybe a minute on it, and that’s not enough time to read anything.
- In August 2016, after I had supported a particular blogger for four years–comments, sympathy, reading her novel, reblogging her–she threatened me with a lawsuit for *quoting* her with full attribution (well within my rights under copyright law regarding Fair Use). I took the quotes down, but after this, I wanted nothing to do with her anyway, or with promoting her blog. But the fear and trepidation over this had to succumb to real-life trouble because a couple of days later, I got the call that my dad was dying in a few days. That was a very difficult month–but I got through it, and I warn others about this blogger. She is very popular online, and has had many other victims as well. Or rather, she was–I’m very relieved to see that her blog is now offline and apparently has been for a while now. Maybe people can still find good things in her book to help them understand narcissists, but she encouraged people to stay “stuck” in the anger stage–even yelled at people who said we should try to heal eventually–and blamed people for being victims of narcissists if they didn’t fit a certain category. This is all very harmful, so I’m glad to see her no longer running a blog where she victimizes people who come to her for help. Meanwhile, my own blog and website are still up, and I encourage you to try to heal and move on after your anger has run its course. You’ll be much happier than if you endlessly try to find ways to “get even.”
- In early 2017 and again in early 2018, this blog was inundated with hits from malicious and obsessive trolls who had been stalking another blogger for a couple of years. He’d attracted a whole mob of them, who now started checking me out for talking to him. I had only just gotten a Twitter account, which they used to find my blog, where they began leaving snarky comments and combing through my archives looking for who knew what. I used the blog for therapy and wrote all sorts of things about my past, so I feared what these people planned to do with it. Even when the mob abated, I was told they still stalked my blog and Twitter and talked about me in their little circle. I occasionally saw evidence of that, myself. But for many months now, they still stalk the blog and Twitter account of their original target but seem to be leaving me alone.
Meanwhile, I have learned a lot about blogging and running a website. I have learned things that have helped in healing from the past. I’ve been working on a new novel for nearly four years now, a new passion, along with defeating Trump and what has become of the GOP in the last several decades. I have learned a lot about and/or changed my mind about a lot of things, from politics to religion to abuse to history…. This has all happened over the fourteen years of this blog/website, and you can find it all in the archives.
I have also been very active on Twitter, here. I don’t write as much on the blog as I used to because Twitter is a good way to share retweets and keep my followers up-to-date without having to go through the trouble of writing a blog post for everything that’s on my mind. I encourage you to follow it (unless you’re a troll).