I got one of these a few months ago:
http://www.skete.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=product.display&Product_ID=2752&Category_ID=110 [link no longer works; was a three-bar cross]
…Because, until I got that three-barred cross, my other crosses just didn’t seem “Orthodox” enough. And goodness knows, if you want to convert to Orthodoxy, it’s gotta be all the way, right?
As a friend of mine at church, a college guy converting to Orthodoxy, said, “Like cell phones, the more bars, the better!”
Must have the icon corner with 50 icons…Must have the headscarf….Must have every Orthodox book the other converts have and claim to have read….Must dress like a 19th-century Russian peasant and wear a long, scraggly beard (assuming you’re a man, that is)….Must get upset that the people at church (Orthodox since birth) don’t do it “right,” the priest dresses too Catholic, there’s an organ and pews, nobody fasts beyond cutting out meat during the 10,000 Lenten days of the year–is outrage!
And must subscribe to Hyperdox Herman on Facebook! Oh, wait, that page makes fun of people with Orthodox convertitis. Heresy! Is outrage!
And yes, since it can be hard to get this across on the Net, this is tongue-in-cheek. 🙂