Musings

[This was originally a Facebook post.]

Waiting to hear back on Jeff’s second interview at the M– job…..

This past week has given two reminders of why I wouldn’t mind moving to Sheboygan: We ran into the ex-friends (Richard and Tracy).  Twice, exactly one week apart.

Jeff and our son Daniel ran into them at the store last Sunday (and heard Tracy scolding Richard, as usual); then they came to Greek Fest.

I was following Jeff and Daniel through the main hall, on our way to the kitchen where I was going to wash dishes, and I practically ran into Richard.

I know he saw me; he couldn’t have missed me, because he was facing my direction and I was right in front of him.  I just turned and walked past him without saying a word.

I hope it sent a very clear message of how disgusted we are at what they have done, and that it includes him, too.

Betrayal from your best friend is not something you just excuse.

Of course, he’s probably glad to see that I’m not some drama queen out to make a scene, yelling and such….

Three months ago, I also reported these people for child and domestic abuse.

It was not out of revenge–heck, I resisted doing it for a long time after the breakup.

It was out of concern for the family, all the dysfunction and abuse that was going on all the time.

I got the impression that there was a lot more going on than I was ever told, hints of “drama” and the like, they did things right in front of me, and Richard even told me of things he had done and excused.

Privacy laws mean I can’t find out what Social Services did with the report, but I don’t see how it could have been screened out and ignored, with all the things I described.

And if they got details of the allegations, they probably know exactly who told.  Which means that when we encounter each other like this, they know I reported them.  AWK-ward.

But necessary.  I can’t stand the thought of those kids growing up damaged, to become abusers or abused, and me having done nothing at all to at least try to help them.

I also can’t stand the thought of Richard telling me how Tracy was verbally abusing him, even hitting him so much that he struggled not to hit back, of him saying that if she ever hit his face, he’d say, “You’re not a woman” and hit back–and me having done nothing at all to help him.

Especially when, shortly after I reported them, an abusive relationship turned deadly here in Fondy, resulting in a policeman and the shooter (James Cruckson) being killed.

Even if I am disgusted at the ex-friend’s betrayals, and the many things constantly coming to mind that show a pattern of his gaslighting, deceit and manipulation–I still couldn’t live with myself.

So at least it has been done.  Though they probably hate me for it, it had to be done…..

But at the same time I think how much I’d like to move away from all this, I would miss the people I know here, the people at church…..

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